Jen's Cryptic Diary

The most boring actress in the world, Jennifer Aniston, told InStyle her plans for 2006 include buying a house, reading more books and writing in a diary again.

“I’ve been on and off with it,” she said about her diary. “I had a boyfriend who read my journal, like, 15 years ago, and it bummed me out. Now I find myself writing cryptically, not writing full names, as though somebody someday will dig this up.”

She is a crafty one. Not writing full names will no doubt confuse any snoop who should have the ability to break the lock on Jen's diary and read the secrets of her heart.

We think her diary reads something like this:

January 11, 2006.
Dear Diary,
I just found out A is pregnant. I can't believe it. How could B do this to me? Doesn't he know this is humiliating? I hope that whore gets stretch marks and hemorrhoids. All of a sudden B likes flying planes and going to the UN? I'm going to read lots of books this year and keep writing in you diary...that'll show them.

We could go on and on with Friends references and the like but you get the idea. She's an idiot.