would you blog me

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Healthcare Protests

Celebrities Really Are Stupid

If you don't know, I loathe Patricia Heaton. She's a big phony annoying person. I think she is religious, so it's surprising that she seems so botoxed.

Here she is on last night's Millionaire show. At the end of the show they have a celebrity come on to answer one question for charity. I think she is trying to act dumb to be cute. But it is really obnoxious.

On tonight's show, Wynonna Judd can't answer this question: If you had 4 shirts, and 3 pairs of pants how many different outfits could you make?

It took me 10 seconds to figure that out (each pants gets 4 shirts...so 12 different outfits)

Luckily for Wynonna's charity, her phone-a-friend was her aunt who knows basic math.

Addicted to Fish Mouth

I was flipping channels and started watching part of Addicted to Beauty, a reality show on Oxygen that takes place at a plastic surgery office.

The people working there looked so freaky- is this what we want people to look like? I was almost laughing at how absurd the women looked.

The CEO:

The Spa Director:

I hope these aren't breast that they are going to use...just sitting around on the counter.

No More

Last I heard Sean Penn and Robin Wright were back together.

She tells More magazine that they are no more (a ha ha! get it?).

New Mad Men Tonight

The Daily Show

If you find yourself watching Glenn Beck for your news, walk yourself over to the nearest hospital and say "5150". That's the code for crazy. And I know that because it was a Van Halen album title.

Glenn Beck's Operation

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

"You've gone soft...nice spine" cracks me up.

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Class of '43

Stay with this until the end.

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Healther Skelter

Eunice Shrivers Funeral

Maria Shriver helps carry her mother's casket. I just about burst out in tears seeing this.

Ted Kennedy's first wife and current wife. Ted Kennedy didn't attend.

Jon Bon Jovi was there. Wait, huh?

Oprah and Gayle!

RIP Eunice Kennedy Shriver

Kennedy sister, mother to Maria (and some cool sons) and founder of the Special Olympics passed away at age 88.

Letters From John Hughes

A blogger recalls the pen pal friendship she had with John Hughes. You should read it. Even if his movies weren't the amazing masterpieces they were to me, you should read about what a nice guy he was.

John Hughes- Danke Schoen

Recently a friend and I were talking about She's Having a Baby- well, I was talking about it and my friend said she hadn't seen it (You haven't?!?! was my reply). I had just seen a beautiful dance to "This Woman's Work" by Kate Bush and it reminded me of the scene in She's Having a Baby where Kevin Bacon is in the waiting room of a hospital while his wife is having an emergency c-section. It will bring tears to your eyes.

It's one of many movie scenes from a John Hughes movie that I think of, or quote. If someone says "married" half the time I reply with "mawwied" like Long Duk Dong of Sixteen Candles (no matter how un-PC that is).

And how many times have you heard someone say "Bueller? Bueller?" when asking a question. A reference to Ben Stein's teacher in Ferris Bueller's Day Off. At the time I thought Ferris singing Wayne Newton's Danke Schoen during a parade was perfectly cheesey. "I recall Central Park in fall..."

At a slumber party, one of the parents talked to the theater and got us into The Breakfast Club, which was rated R. We thought that was so cool.

Surprisingly, he only directed 8 films- Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Weird Science, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Planes Trains and Automobiles, She's Having a Baby, Uncle Buck, Curly Sue. Only Curly Sue would be one I don't know (I've heard of it, but can't quote it).

I would've said Sixteen Candles and Pretty in Pink were the pivitol teen movies for me; I'm surprised he didn't direct Pretty in Pink. And that's where his writing comes in- he wrote a lot of movies.

In addition to the 8 he directed, he wrote:
-Mr. Mom, one of my favorite comedies
-Vacation, Christmas Vacation
-Pretty in Pink
-Some Kind of Wonderful
-The Great Outdoors
-Home Alone (and some sequels)
and about 20 others

John Hughes died today at age 59.

I love that these movies, and soundtracks, are part of my teen years. They were perfect.

Bing Provided the Plane?

No, not the new search engine. Stephen Bing. The really rich guy who knocked up a few women (Elizabeth Hurley...and some rich guy's wife I think) and used to be in the tabloids a few years ago. Bill and Bing are buds, and word has it Bing lent his private plane for the Korea trip. So, no tax payer money was used for the flight.

As tonight's Daily Show pointed out, it took 4 minutes from the time Fox Fake News first reported of the rescue until they crapped all over it. Didn't Greta do investigations on Natalee Holloway? I'm not saying that they'd be happy if the people rescued were blonde...just wondering why they can't be human for once and just report the good news.

Source: Reuters

RIP Sam the Koala

The badly burned koala, filmed drinking from a volunteer firefighter's water bottle, became a symbol of hope for the survivors of the deadly bushfires that killed 173 people and left 7,500 homeless.

But just months after her rescue from the fires, Sam was diagnosed with cysts linked to the life-threatening disease chlamydia that has ravaged the koala population.

The four-year-old koala was due to have surgery today to remove the cysts but John Butler of the Morwell Vet Clinic discovered Sam had severe changes in her urinary and reproductive tract that were non-operable.

Photo, source: AP

Paula Quits American Idol Over Money

Sigh.

Another celeb who just can't make do on a couple million dollars a year. And not just any celeb. A crazy, whacked-out, alleged druggie who falls asleep/passes out in mid sentence.

I don't know in what world the AI producers don't think she is genius and do what they can to keep her. And I don't know in what world Paula thinks she'll get another job that will put up with that. So You Think You Can Dance already has a crazy lady.

Apparently Paula didn't like that Ryan Seacrest was getting more money. Listen, none of us are happy about that. But that is just the way the douchey ball bounces.

Photo: AP

Journalists Are Released

Bill Clinton went over to North Korea, told Kim whatsup, and the two journalists that have been held in prison for months are on their way home.

Repubs, being based on a platform of hate and negativity, will no doubt try and see this as a bad thing.

You Didn't Think Those People Shouting at Town Meetings Were Real, Did You?

At town halls around the country, dems are talkin' 'bout healthcare, and crazies stand up and scream.

Smart people figured out these people were plants. They are shipped around the country to distract. Here is the memo they were given on how to act.

Personally, I think the devil horns drawn on one congressman's photo was a giveaway (a bit overdone...especially over healthcare).

The Daily Show shows you how it was done with Fox Fake News' help.

Master Rebators - The Crank Cycle

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Griffin O'Neal on Larry King

Griffin O'Neal, son of Ryan, was on Larry King last night and he wasn't afraid to dish the dirt. He said his Dad was violent, was not faithful to Farrah, and that he may be having intimate relations with Alana Stewart (Farrah's best friend- and he did not have any proof, just speculation).

According to Griffin

-Ryan and Alana were exploiting Farrah (I can't disagree with him...Griffin also claimed that Alana was selling Farrah's items on eBay the day she died, and that he knows the eBay seller's name)

-The interview with Ryan right before Farrah's death was odd, with Ryan saying he would marry Farrah as soon as she could talk (again, I agree- that was odd)

-That weird altercation a few years ago where Ryan was arrested for trying to shoot Griffin, but was later not charged, stemmed from Griffin trying to get brother Redmond off of drugs. Griffin's pregnant wife got a face injury from a fire poker, but because no one could say for sure how she got it, no one was charged. That's what I mean by weird altercation. And also weird that Griffin said he was stabbed with the poker by Ryan. So why were charges dropped? It didn't make too much sense.

-Ryan gave him cocaine at age 11

In an attempt to be balanced, Larry reads from a piece of paper that Griffin was acquitted of manslaughter in the death of Francis Ford Coppola's son John Carlo in 1986, but charged with negligent operation of a boat.

I don't mean to toot my own gossipy horn, but at the time of Farrah's funeral, the media reported that Tatum and Griffin were at the service. I said they probably meant Tatum and Patrick. Beings Ryan allegedly tried to shoot Griffin, and all. Griffin confirmed to Larry that he was banned from the funeral, despite his good relationship with Farrah.

Hard to know what's true and what's not true. But Ryan recently admitted to hitting on his daughter at Farrah's funeral.

The Larry King transcript

Daily Show

Those morons at Fox actually try to say Bud Light is a foreign beer. Why? Because Obama drinks it! Oy.

They are getting crazier, non?

So You Think You Can Douche

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c