Britney- I Know You Are Getting A Lot of "Dear Britney" Letters of Wisdom on Blogs Today

I hate to be so typical and do one myself to you but your performance last night left me no choice. It's like when my sister wears a bun in public. I have to set her straight. There are some looks we have at home, and some we have in public.

I don't mean to jump on the bandwagon about your uninspired set last night, but here I go.

-The Outfit: Really? That was it? You didn't even have enough energy to strip down to that outfit (you were playing a stripper, right?) you just came out on the stage all ready to go. A trenchcoat, lab coat, heck a down jacket would've added some element of anticipation.

-The Dancing: As a former drillteam captain (I know, I shouldn't brag) I found the routine offensive. And not sexually offensive. Creatively offensive. When you fell back into the guys' arms and they semi lifted you and then pushed you up- it looked like you were too heavy for them to lift. It was odd choreography with moves we've seen a million times before.

-Your Energy: You were like the lazy stripper who is rolling her eyes until her time is up. You're on MTV. It's not like you have to commute 2 hrs to an office job everyday. You get to dance and be paid tons. Try and act grateful. Or quit.

-That Song: I've never seen someone singing about wanting more ("Gimme More") looking like she couldn't care less. Maybe I'm too old, but that song was tres horrible. Join Kabalah or whatever you have to do to get in Madonna's good graces and follow her advice step by step. Except don't adopt. Please. No more kids.

-Get a Gay Man in Your Life: Call Tim Gunn. Or pluck one off the street in West Hollywood. You won't have to say anything. They'll know what to do.



Sincerely,
Lu