MJ Memorial- A Mix of Appropriate and WTF

Smokey Robinson started the show by reading letters from Diana Ross and Nelson Mandela.

Then there is a long pause. So long that commentators scramble to talk more about Michael Jackson.

The casket is brought on stage by his brothers, who are wearing a white sequined glove, sunglasses and yellow ties. A choir sings.


Mariah Carey sings "I'll Be There", which I think she covered and released as a single years ago. She is wearing typical Mariah garb, which means it's too low cut for a funeral.


Queen Latifah reads a poem Maya Angelou wrote for the occasion. Lionel Richie sings something. It's not "Brick House" so I've tuned out.
(It is the Commodore's "Jesus is Love" I find out later. Note- it is not "Jesus is Juice")



Berry Gordy, Motown founder, speaks. He may or may not be responsible in part for the Jackson's tough childhood.


Gordy says this, one of many statements people make that maybe one shouldn't say at someone's funeral- "Sure, there might have been some questionable decisions on his part."

Video montage.

Stevie Wonder says something nice, and sings. I think it's something about December. I should know more of Stevie's songs, I know! (I just looked it up, I was right about it being seasonal, but way off- it's "I Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer")


Kobe and Magic. Magic recalls a story about meeting Jackie Jackson a long time ago, and it almost sounds like they're dating the way Jackie brought Magic on tour with him. He talks about ordering grilled chicken from Michael's chef, and the chef bringing out a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken for Michael.

KFC couldn't have planned that better themselves...well, maybe they did. Magic does commercials for Rent-a-Center, so maybe he could be bought for some product placement.


Jennifer Hudson sings. Had to look it up- "Will You Be There" which is on Dangerous and Free Willy soundtrack.
That white girl had some skinny arms (no, not MJ. The girl standing next to JHud)


Al Sharpton speaks and not Jesse Jackson. Not sure how this happened, but I think it involved a wrasslin' match.



I really didn't think Al would acknowledge the white children. I know, that might sound harsh. But the white kids who are allegedly not biologically related to any Jackson now get 40% of his money. That just might annoy someone in the family. Maybe not. Hope not.

Al did address the children. And he probably meant well. And it is one of the things we don't need to bring up at one's funeral- "There wasn't anything strange about your daddy".

Quick Al- name someone more strange than Michael Jackson.

Then, Al makes another comment that is one we might rethink at a Michael Jackson funeral- something about Michael "pulling his pants up". I certainly hope this is a reference to how guys wear slouchy pants now.

John Mayer plays Human Nature on guitar and makes those annoying faces. It's a bit muzak, and some guy (backup singer?) sings part of the song. From what I could tell- Mayer didn't tweet during the performance (he's addicted, if ya don't know).


Brooke Shields speaks, and it was a bit moving. If I remember correctly, she hasn't talked to him since the 90's (and I could be wrong).



Jermaine sang Michael's favorite song "Smile". He didn't do as bad as I thought. Two of Martin Luther Jr's children spoke.



Some congresswoman from Texas says something you shouldn't say at someone's funeral- "You are innocent until proven guilty". She talks a long time, has some plague, says congress is going to debate on something Michael Jackson related (legend status or something).

Usher sings "Gone Too Soon". He walks down the stairs to the casket and does what looks like a fake cry.


One of Britain's talent winners, a 12 yr old, sings. Later, during the group song, I saw Berry Gordy with his arm around him. (not in that way, in a "I want to produce your first album" way). Run!

Finale- We Are the World and some other song. Janet has a beret on, Latoya has a hat on like Samantha did when she got a bad chemical peel on Sex and the City. Rebbie, the unknown sister, also has a hat on.

After Jermaine says something about him being Michael's backbone, Marlon talks for a bit and ends by referencing his twin Brandon, who died after birth. I didn't think I had heard of a Brandon Jackson.


The crowd screams for Janet, but Janet directs Paris to the mic. As soon as she starts talking there are many adult hands trying to adjust the mic. Ok, Tito, Randy (I'm just guessing, have no idea who is who), no need to be so eager with the mic. Can you just see future family picnics. Paris drops her fork and Tito and Jackie dive for it. (She's got the money, ya know)

I sincerely hope they are really this caring for the children while not on tv.



For the most part it was not as tacky as it could have been. I mean, how do you honor someone so talented but so troubled?

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